William

After abandoning a life of civilized comfort, William decided to leave society and sailed the seven seas at the hardened age of three. While sailing leisurely in the eye of a perfect storm his ship finally capsized leaving him to swim for 3 months before washing up on the shores of Africa where he joined a pride of lions and raised them as his own. After years of ruling the jungle, he longed for seclusion and decided to leave his pride for the thrill of Antarctica. It was there he came upon the most ferocious of bears and with nothing but a wooden spoon, William conquered his foe. It was later that evening William celebrated his 14^th birthday. Soon after he realized that even in a place unforgiving as Antarctica there would be no man or beast that could match his devastation. After realizing this infallible truth William swam for the greatest of the English where he taught boxing lessons to a young Michael Peterson who has become more commonly known as Charles Bronson. Soon after, he moved to the United States and met a woman named Wilma Nee Scarberry and after one passionate night, moved on to live as a mountain man in the hills of Tennessee. After many years William returned to the society he left as a child and submitted his designs to the office of patents for what is now known as a space shuttle, electric guitar, nuclear powered submarine and the slap chop. Among many things, William is an avid rock climber, classic car collector, airplane pilot, astronaut, pirate, banana farmer, elephant herder, UFO mechanic, electrical engineer, gynecologist, sandwich artist, professional ice carver and amateur race car driver. Some of his hobbies include but are not limited to, skydiving without a parachute, lion wrestling, car lifting, beard growing, bare knuckle bear boxing, and arm wrestling anacondas.